How to change the story you tell about yourself
The story you tell yourself is the most powerful story you will ever hear. So make sure you are telling the right story.
Helping women tell the story about themselves
When I first had the idea for the private club the Stylish Wellness Institute, it came from a desire to create a space, at the time a physical space, uniquely for women. It would be a space where women could come and spend time on themselves to be well. You didn’t need to come because you were ill, you would come because you wanted to restore a sense of order and balance into your life.
Maybe you had had a hectic schedule over a prolonged period of time and felt exhausted and depleted. Maybe you had lost hope in one way or another. Maybe nothing was wrong, you just wanted to improve your life, your feelings about yourself. Whatever it may have been, there would be this idea of wanting to show up in the world in a bigger, better, more authentic way.
How to learn to be the best version of yourself
You would come to this physical location, I had in mind a big, airy building with lots of glass and open plan areas. And we would hold classes, talks and seminars on all the topics that I talk about in Working Frocks:
How to be the best version of yourself;
How to curate your clothes like an art gallery owner;
How to look amazing everyday;
How to put systems in place to look great whilst having a very busy life;
How to journal around your clothes so that you can work out what you are thinking and make any necessary changes in your life.
In my mind I called this place the Wellness Institute or Wellbeing Institute. Not only would it offer courses and lectures and workshops for all things personal styling, personal grooming, but it would also offer courses for the mind. Courses like:
How to manage your mind;
How to become the real you;
How to become the best version of you.
These are all topics which require a brain refocus or change.
How to change the story you tell about yourself
Changing the story you tell yourself about yourself is a brain game. I began to understand that as I underwent my own study and practice of managing my mind. I had no idea that I could change my thoughts, direct my thoughts.
In fact I had no idea I could control my brain and decide how I wanted life to be, rather than let my brain dictate to me how life would work out. Changing the story you tell yourself about yourself is a brain game and it is the greatest fun to create your own story and decide for yourself how you are going to live your life.
At the same time as understanding that what I wanted to offer women was of real benefit and has the potential to be truly transformatory in their lives, I was also filled with doubt. I doubted myself. I thought that maybe my plans were self indulgent. Maybe they were froth and not substance. And then one day this phrase popped into my head.
Self Care is purpose, not vanity
“Self care is purpose, not vanity.”
It was a moment of real clarity and understanding and in that moment the penny dropped and I understood my own purpose so much better.
I had been doubting my own purpose.
Why do we think that other women’s talents are better than our own?
I could understand when other women are given the gift to be doctors or nurses and heal people, when women are given the gift of teaching and teach our children, or given the gift of learning and become lawyers.
But I felt that my own gifts, of encouragement and intense curiosity around what people wear and why they wear it, were perhaps secondary gifts to all other gifts and talents that women are given. You may feel the same. You may think that everyone else has better talents than you, more natural gifts than you. But this is really not true. You are created as a unique human being and your life’s purpose is to discover who you are. Valuing yourself and your talents is self care. And,
Self care is purpose, not vanity.
All gifts are equal
When I finally understood the my gifting is an equal gifting to all others, and truly accepted it, I also understood the importance of self care. When you look after yourself well, you can achieve anything, be anyone, do anything. You need that mindset of self care and looking after yourself to show up in the world every day and be the woman you have been created to be.
So, what is it that you want? A promotion? An improved personal life? To go on a journey of self discover? To develop a unique and wonderful personal style? To clear up your mess and lead a beautiful, organised life? To earn a million dollars, or move to the country and grow lavender?
First start with who do you want to be
Whatever it is, start with yourself. Who you are. Who you are showing up in the world as. The woman you want to be in the future, let’s create her now. Self care is purpose, not vanity. Come and discover that for yourself. The Stylish Wellness Institute is the private club that I created out of all my dreams of a wellness institute. Check it out here.