Self creation: 2 stages to looking good. Which stage are you on?

Smiling woman. Caption: 2 stages to looking good. Which stage are you at?

Hello amazing women, I hope you’ve had a good week.

This week I have been thinking about what it is exactly that transforms our personal appearance from ‘perfectly acceptable’ to ‘Wow, how does she do that!?’ (aka the act of self creation)

I love the authenticity of being yourself. Of having the courage to be yourself. To be able to accept yourself just as you are. But also to also have the determination to change yourself. To go on that inner and outer journey to be the best woman that you can be.

How do we go on that journey of not only accepting ourself, but also be transforming ourself?

Think of it in two stages.

Stage one is simply looking good. It’s a good haircut, clothes that suit you, well applied make up and doing this consistently every day in all situations.  This will more or less guarantee that you feel great about yourself and in control of your life.

However the next stage to looking good is the act of self creation. It’s the act of becomingImage of woman in grey jumper smiling at camera you, of becoming more and more like you every day.

Life gives to us in abundance

In life we are given a great big pile of natural attributes: personality style, likes, dislikes, looks, genetic make up, bodyshape, interests, desires, academic ability, sporting prowess, artistic ability and much more.

And it is up to each of us individually to take all those different elements and create our life from them.

In our careers, for example, we have certain strengths, certain weaknesses, preferences and passions. That’s what leads us into our career choices.

With personal styling the same applies. We have certain strengths, which we could be using to create ourselves. But we don’t necessarily pay attention to creating ourselves in the same way that we might pay attention to creating a career or building a family life.

Is self creation superficial?

It might seem superficial to think about creating ourselves in this way.

But really it isn’t superficial at all.  It is the act of creating yourself in the world, of creating who you want to be. It is fundamental to who you are. You are given a certain number of attributes and characteristics, what can you do with them to create a life you love, and even more importantly to create a person that you love?

Who do you want to be in this life?

Who do you want to show up as every day?

Avoid self defeating talk.

Phrases like, “Oh she looks so good, I could never look like that.” make my blood boil.  Because we are all created to ‘look like that’.

I feel I can talk about this subject because for such a long time I didn’t want my particular set of characteristics.  I wanted to be tall, athletic and have long legs, instead of which I’m small, curvy and small waisted. Which reminds me of The Devils wears Prada. So my first step was to accept my characteristics as mine. And to agree with myself that I’m fine like I am. In fact to agree that I am beautiful and perfect in all of my imperfections. As you are too.

The second step for me was to understand that there was a difference between having these characteristics and really making the best of them.

This is where the act of self creation comes in.

So the first stage is to realise that we have these attributes and make sure that each day we are looking after them, maintaining them.

But the second stage is an inner work. It’s the decision to take those characteristics and really create ourselves.

You can see the women who have done this for themselves.  They are the ones who you notice immediately. There is something about them that other women do not seem to have.

Women at the second stage – the act of self creation

Quite often their style might be quite daring, or daring to you: They might have really short hair, or wear body hugging clothes that take confidence to wear. Or wear Doc Marten boots with a summer dress. Or head to toe Chanel. Or head to toe vintage.

Whatever their style, they have a deliberateness about them that is noticeable and unmistakeable.

But the thing is, it’s not about the clothes or the haircut.  And you can feel that about them. It’s about who they are and what they want to say about themselves in their life that really matters to them.

Turning the tables on you


Here is the big question.

What do you want to say about your life that really matters?Image of Sarah and Bertie the dog. Bertie is kissing Sarah.

What is it about yourself that you want to communicate?

How do you want to show up in the world day in day out.

Because that really is a gift.  The showing up as you want is such a privilege.

Don’t overlook it.

Don’t let it slip away.

Don’t panic either if you’re not currently paying attention to yourself.

Get started with the act of self creation today.

Tell me what you are going to do to get going?

Do you know what you are going to do to get yourself started on this journey?

I can help you

I can help you. We have created reDRESS for exactly this purpose. To help you in your act of self creation in this world.  To help you be the person you want to be and look like the person you want to look like. It’s very exciting, I am excited on your behalf 🙂

Because it’s not just about looking like you want to look.  It’s about what you do with it then. When you start to realise the power that you have in just being you, then life changes.  It becomes a great adventure instead of what it can sometimes feel like, a dull treadmill.

Dressing well is an act of creation. Are you creating?

Don’t let it pass you by.

Check out reDRESS today

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If you are not ready to join us in reDRESS then why not join our newsletter list?  Then you can keep in touch, still receive communication from Working Frocks and be on the journey with us:


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Have you checked out our Wardrobe Journalling page? It’s a great resource for journalling as a way of discovering more about yourself, your personal style and how you want to show up in this world.

Leave me a comment if you have questions, or something to say, or you want to tell me about your own journey of self creation.

Have a great day!


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